"All sorts of entertaining" - Elizabeth Seckman

"Michael and his pals make me wish I lived in Adelaide" - Cherdo

"If I had a daughter, I'd send her to Australia to meet him (and marry him)" - Robyn Alana Engel

"An Australian version of me. Only younger. And Talented. And better looking. Okay, nothing like me." - Al Penwasser

"Whom must I fuck or pay to get a quotation at the top of your blog post?" - Janie Junebug

Monday, 29 June 2015

That's Enough for a Cabinet

Chrys Fey is a very talented blogger who's very giving of her time and knowledge. She decided I was deserving of the "Creative Blogger Award", one of the more prominent awards that are handed around the blogger community. But she's going to make me jump through hoops to get it - I have to tell you five random facts about myself and pass it on to two other bloggers. Because I'm desperate for more recognition, this seemed a small price to pay.

Here are five random things you probably don't know about me:
  1. I've hated seafood ever since I got a fish bone stuck in my throat at a young age. But for some reason I love eating tinned tuna.
  2. The only time I've ever fainted (apart from the one time I passed out from drinking) was when I was getting a LOT of blood taken to be tested. The doctor told me to fast for 12 hours before the test and being me, I decided I'd go 15 hours just for good measure. The nurse put the needle in and started to take tube after tube of blood, and at one point she said "Now let me know if you start to get woozy." I'd been fine up until that point, but as soon as she said it I started to feel light-headed. I thought it was just some sort of placebo affect, so I laughed and said "Well now that you MENTION it, I'm woozy..." The next thing I knew, the nurse was trying to call my name and shake me awake.
  3. For a short guy, I constantly surprise people with how high I can jump.
  4. The perfume I buy for my car is much more expensive than the perfume I buy for me.
  5. The "G" stands for George.
Now there are TONS of creative people here on blogger. The obvious choice would be to give it to Pat Hatt. But I figure everyone on the internet would give it to him, so this time I'll just give him an honourable mention. The two recipients will be...


Debra at She Who Seeks!

They're two of my favourite blogs to read. I hope they become yours too. Spread the love!

Friday, 26 June 2015

AFL Shenanigans: Changeup

Adam lost interest in the challenge a few weeks ago. He just has a lot more important things to worry about, which is understandable. He tried to keep going for as long as he could, but as soon as I tried to make him eat a whole jar of Vegemite, he decided he was out.

So this week, there'll be no challenge. But I'm proud to announce that we've found a new contestant. Meet Dimi, my oldest friend and someone with which I go through many adventures. After assuring him that we wouldn't make him wear a dress or eat cat food if he didn't want to, he decided to come on board.

I look forward to having a fellow competitor who's not only up for an adventure, but also goes for the same team as me. Go Power!

Monday, 22 June 2015

What Goes Around...

My cheeks have gone red.

Another blogger has decided I'm deserving of the "Very Inspiring Blogger Award". This award circulated through my blogging circle around January/February - Sherry Ellis won it first and gave it to Chrys Fey. Chrys wanted to award it to me, but saw that Sherry had already done it, so she gave it to Cherdo. Cherdo thought "bugger it" and gave it to me anyway, while also giving one to Janie Junebug. After a long wait, Janie decided I deserved it again.

You guys... I'm blushing like a schoolboy smitten.

Here are the rules:

1. Thank the blogger (Thank you Janie!)
2. Upload a picture of the award (Oh, right)

3. Mention three things that have inspired you in the last few weeks.
4. Nominate 15 other bloggers (I'm changing that to 2. Read the last award post for my explanation)
5. Let them know they've won.

Three things that have inspired me:

Well the first is Janie giving me this award. I never know how to handle such compliments without sounding arrogant, but I really do appreciate the vote of confidence. It's nice to know that that the things I do and believe get noticed and looked at favourably. It makes me want to do it more.

While we're talking about feedback, I've done a number of things lately which people have been really encouraging about. Things like the speech I made at my sister's 21st birthday, the one-off quiz night fundraiser I hosted at St Joseph's Primary School, my job producing a radio show lately and the footy umpiring I do every week. Things into which I put a lot of effort. I've been getting a lot of congratulations for these things and from unexpected places too.

I listen to the Monday Morning Podcast with Bill Burr and in a recent episode he talked about how he was once watching Judge Judy with his friend Patrice O'Neal. They were laughing about how angry she gets with no provocation so Bill tried to convince Patrice to play a game with him. One of them would sue the other one (didn't matter who or for what), they'd get themselves onto the show and then they'd both see how angry they could get her. Afterwards they'd pay each other back any money they owe and it would be like it never happened. I loved that idea so much and I wish I'd gotten to see it happen. Those two were the perfect people to pull it off - I imagined Patrice saying "Hey Lady, be quiet when a man is talking." And Bill yelling "Yeah, you tell him judge! Show him who's boss!" I pictured the crowd doubling over with laughter and the bailiff not even being able to keep a straight face. It made me want to find more laughter in life. I do think I'm funny, but it's all "wit" funny - I don't yet know how to pick out the ridiculousness in life. That story made me want to work on that.

So now the nominations:
  • Theresa Mahoney at Theresa's Mixed Nuts - She seems to have a really good close-knit family around her and I love hearing about them. And her partnership with Golden Blossom Honey is fantastic, because the photos she puts up of the food look so, so, so good.
  • Caitlin S at Candy Floss & Persie - She's a big fashionista, but while most fashionistas talk about nothing else, she's so much deeper than that. She often makes moral points that make me think "Shit, you nailed that!" And I can relate to a lot of the things she enjoys.

Friday, 19 June 2015

AFL Shenanigans Round 11: Slap Staring Contest

The video explains it.

Tuesday, 16 June 2015

Off-Topic 2

A few weeks ago I talked about how much I love abstract conversations like what's the best kind of sauce and what I'd do when a lion attacks. Well last week I had another one of these conversations which I just had to put into writing. I was with Kelsey and we were discussing (not seriously) the of he and I buying a place to live.

'We'd need a good way of resolving disputes,' I said.
'We could work that all out in the contract,' said Kelsey.
'But there'll always be SOMETHING that comes up that we haven't covered in the contract. So we need something as like an arbitrary tie breaker. Like a game of match or something.'
'Oh yeah, anything we can't work out any other way, we'll work out with rock-paper-scissors!'
'Can that be legally binding?'
'I don't know.'
'I guess we'd have to work out the rules in the contract. There would have to be a paragraph that says "The participants will hold one hand flat with their palm pointed upwards and the other hand in a fist. They will say 1, 2, 3, shoot! dropping their fist onto their open palm on each count and selecting their weapon on the word shoot"'
'Would that be the first time the rules of that game have been explained legally?'

'We're trendsetters!' I yelled. 'But I dunno,  rock-paper-scissors seems a bit too boring. I'd want a proper competition.'
'Like what?'
'I could play against you on your Madden NFL game?'
'You'd have an advantage there.'
'Would I though?'
'Yeah I haven't played that game since I played it with you last year.'
'Well how about a joust?'
'I'd want to make it a game of chance, otherwise one of us will always be better at it.'
'How could we possibly know who's better at jousting??'
'Oh yeah, good point.'
'We'd do it properly - hire horses and suits of armour etc. Maybe even get a crowd going.'
'But then we'd end up spending more money than what we're fighting over.'
'...Bugger. There goes that idea.'

We'll go back to the drawing board.

Friday, 12 June 2015

AFL Shenanigans Round 10: Push Ups

It was a three-way tie this week. A lot of debate over what our challenge should be. I ended up winning and picking a challenge that really just gave me a chance to show off.

Monday, 8 June 2015

My Rules for Life

I sat down recently and thought to myself "What are my absolutes when it comes to life?" In a world where literally everything will be contradicted by someone else who shares a different belief, is there anything I can consider to be the undisputed truth? Of course, the answer is no. The closest I can come is to come up with things that I personally have held to be 100% true. I came up with three rules, and in all the interactions, observations and experiences I've ever had, nothing has contradicted them yet. For me, these are my rules in life.

  1. Understand people, understand the world. If you truly understand why a person thinks, behaves, says, believes and does what they do, living in their world becomes much easier in many different ways.
  2. You can't change a person's behaviour unless they invite you to do so. If you attempt to change a person's behaviour without their accepting your position of authority, this attempt will be met with at best apathy and at worst resentment. You can however change your own behaviour, which will affect the world around you anyway.
  3. There are no bad people, only bad things. If people do bad things, it will be because...
    A) They've justified their actions to themselves as being appropriate (this covers everyone from sociopaths to terrorists)
    B) They're inadvertently dealing with the stress of an unresolved issue, whether long-term (losing their job, being in debt, relative dying) or immediate (being yelled at, looming deadline or just having a bad day).

Friday, 5 June 2015

AFL Shenanigans Round 9: Ice Bath

We called up Adelaide's only indoor paintball place.

'Hi my name's Michael, I'm part of a YouTube team that's doing a series at the moment. I was wondering if we could come down there today and shoot one of our members in the back.'
'Um... No, we can't do that,' came the unimpressed voice of the lady at the other end. 'We don't allow people to just come in and bruise their mates.'
'Absolutely, what's a safe distance we could do it from? Because we don't want to cause any actual damage, we just want to take the shot and that's that.'
'No look, it's bad for the image of paintball if we let all these people come in and film these stunts for YouTube.'
'Oh, I didn't realise you get this request often.'
'I'm going to have to say no.'
'Okay, thanks for your time.'

I hung up.
'Okay boys, looks like we're going with the backup plan.'
'So you're going to pick up some ice from the service station?'
'Sure am, do you think 30 kilos will do?'

Monday, 1 June 2015

Question of the Month (June 2015)

This is the first of the monthly Question of the Month bloghop, where we find out a bit more about each other with stuff that we don't normally think about. This month's question is "If your house caught on fire, what' the one thing you'd grab before running out?"

For me, it would be my backpack. I brink one around with me everywhere and while it's got a lot of my most important stuff in there - my wallet, my camera, my phone charger, my notebooks - as well as some stuff that's not so important, but I still wouldn't want to lose, like my $150 sunglasses. Most importantly, my backpack contains a hard drive with all my photos, videos, music and documents from my computer. I back it up at the beginning of each month and it means I could leave my laptop alone and the only important thing I'd lose is my saved Minecraft games.

I'm assuming in this case that my phone is already in my pocket, which it usually is. If it isn't that still wouldn't change my answer, it would just suck having to lose it.

If you want to join the bloghop for next month, sign up below. The next question will be "What are three things you'd do tomorrow if fear wasn't stopping you?"

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