"All sorts of entertaining" - Elizabeth Seckman

"Michael and his pals make me wish I lived in Adelaide" - Cherdo

"If I had a daughter, I'd send her to Australia to meet him (and marry him)" - Robyn Alana Engel

"An Australian version of me. Only younger. And Talented. And better looking. Okay, nothing like me." - Al Penwasser

"Whom must I fuck or pay to get a quotation at the top of your blog post?" - Janie Junebug

Friday, 13 November 2015

Friend-Zoned (Not That Way)

Cherdo (visit her) has signed her papers, passed the votes and declared my blog a Friend-Zone. It's the term used to describe a blog that's family-friendly, non-offensive, a place where everyone can go for wholesome entertainment.

I don't like this image. I want to be the bad-boy of the blogosphere. So I'm going to remake myself. Here are a few things that should fix that nice-guy image right up.

  • Your child isn't as good at that thing as you think it is.
  • Don't tell me you're busy. Just tell me you don't want to come.
  • If you think the last three Star Wars films were so bad, what makes you think this next one will be any good?
  • If I meet you for the first time and you're wearing a suit, I'll find it 3-4 times harder to trust you.
  • You know you don't HAVE to study law or medicine right?
  • Wearing sneakers with jeans is not weird.
  • I wear a baseball cap inside quite often. Sue me.
  • If you're studying at uni, I probably have more money than you.
  • Speaking of which - don't complain to me about your money problems while you're buying a $40 bottle of Vodka.
  • Make a decision - are you a couple or not?


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